the Chinese new year holidays are over!relieved or sad?im pretty much ambivalent abt it, on one hand, i didnt get to do much visiting only did it at my grandma's on monday. fullstop.period. i was bored to tears after that. thank God for some of my church friends,alaster,pang,quek. caught a movie in the night. The Punisher at 2.20am!my latest or rather earliest movie ever!haha.pretty alright show. but not worth my $10.but i managed to win about $25 during "21" and "10", so heck, i won back my movie ticket and even my cab ride home after the movie=)
tuesday saw me playing mahjong through the night!slept at 5.30am and had to drag myself out of bed at 10am for i had work at CLimb Asia at 11=(.booo.i was horribly sleep deprived. and the can of red bull after work did justice!i couldnt doze off after that no matter how hard i tried.boo again. climbed with sherman after work at CA. been ages since i last saw that pighead!haha.secretly training him to get into the NUS team this AUG!=)
Wed: a super tired me dragged myself to school, wanted to run with Faz before training, till i had a tummy ache.plus i was pretty much sleep deprived i didnt want to faint halfway on the track.and best, i totally forgot that there would be a mock comp during trg and i had been climbing in the afternoon!!
hmmm.jensen once again asked me if i was still in the nat team.i had no ideas.literally. called aizan, and he could only check and get back to me a few days later.booo.but i told jensen anw that i think i would drop to the inter cat. hmm.it felt a lil wierd joinin the inter cat. for once, the people in the isolation zones were different, reg,daff,shu hui,si ying,shaoting,yi wei, diana. i remember goin into isolation with ladies like zhao xiu,doris,sandra,cherlene,charlene. all those strong ironladies!
went in and did my first climb easily. i was happy and got a lil too complacent. so when it came to my 2nd route. it looked easy, but i climbed the wrong way and resulted in burst of laughters and judith calling me a "stupid idiot".booo again.but thank God i managed to finish it. did the 3rd route and 4th route.by the 3rd, i was pumped.totally. and i panicked. was i really that weak!=(
managed to come in 2nd for the inter comp. but i didnt feel much. prob coz i have been competing in the open comps since last year, nvr win of course, nvr get into finals coz i suck and i thought that inter cat would be much easier. the irony being i came from a novice cat since jc, no prizes for bouldering at all and went straight to open.the transition was wierd.really. i know my strength is there.not saying im freaking strong but open cat trg had always been tough. i just suck in route reading.sighh.lots more work to do.
still having mixed feelings of whether i should drop to inter cat. sigh.i feel like i dont belong to inter cat yet i know i suck in open cat. not insulting either of the catagories, but just some indescribable feelings of ambivalance......
went to school today with no voice!!!HORROR OF HORRORS!i've been so used to talking all my life, and suddenly i wake up with no voice?how can!!but it happened. my dady started out pretty badly. was super hungry and since i missed my bus to school, i decided to take a short stroll to the nearby coffeeshop to buy food. when i reached there, i realised i couldnt place my order.because i couldnt talk!nothing came out of my mouth. i just looked at the bread stall with a hungry and pathetic face and walked away. i was too embarrassed to use my phone to type out my order. what if the uncle cant even read English!so pai seh la!
went to sch hungry like a dog,elephant, or any other animal la. SW3204 tutorial was equally horrible. Dr Nair requested for all of us to introduce ourselves and tell everyone why we took this module. great.no voice.how?i had to type my reply to cara who helped me convey the message to Dr Nair and the class.how awful man. did lunch with jansen,jud,yi xiang and xiong,zhao xiu and hh!good good lunch.ate my favourite fish soup=) and struggled to talk to them.sigh.
went for my engineering mod and tutorial again!this time we had to discuss the innovativeness in LEGO. i couldnt talk la.so could only whisper.my group mates were struggling to hear me out.sigh.this is a first for me. people actually have to strain their ears to hear me. usually, they tell me to keep it soft.aye.they finally got their wish today!
LORD, please heal my voice!i want to sing in the bathroom again. i want to talk to YOU properly and to everyone else.
today made me realise the gift of the ability to talk!while waiting for my bus to school, i was thinking of the people who either were born mute or lose their ability to talk. it must be sad. esp for those who used to be able to talk and now cant. my heart goes out to them. and i do not want to take such gifts of sight,hearing,speaking for granted now. Thank you Lord for them=)and after losing my voice today did i realise how important the gift of speech was!!!i surprised i even managed to survive today without talking much.it was miserable but it allowed me to think alot. talk less and reflect more!
okies.this is prob my longest post so far. my fingers are tired from typing and my eyes tired from staring at this screen.out!
feeling a little anxious and worry over it, but i know God will guide me through.
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